Date : September 28, 2008
Time : 3:45 PM
Title : Funfair at St Teresa's Church

wow! what a day!!!
the first thing we, Gen, Jean and I, did was go to the haunted house.. oh my! its was scary!! haha.. we screamed a lot. Gen was annoyingly pulling my shirt. and the collar was sooo stretched!! what a beyotch!! haha,. then they went for mass, i tagged along, awkward but i followed gen for mass last year too anyway. its was awkward when they did the kneeling etc.. when i didn't i felt so EXTRA! haha..!! and they didn't give peace to me!! haha.. never hug me!! lolzz.

we then continued in the fair.. nothing else as exciting,.. then we went on to "study" at Mc's at queensway s.c.. then we had to go home. i went to woodlands cause my mum wanted to have dinner there.. and i just came back at about a quarter past 11.. haiz.. sooo tired..

songs irecently downloaded:

• Mind in the Gutter by Chris Crocker
• Afraid by Nelly Furtado
• Say It Right by Nelly Furtado
• Monsoon by Tokio Hotel
• Shadow by Ashlee Simpson
• Whole Again by Atomic Kittens
• Lonely by Britney Spears
• Speed of Sound by Coldplay
• If you're not the One by Daniel Bedingfield
• Suddenly I See by KT Tunstall
• The Bitter End by Placebo
  

Date : September 25, 2008
Time : 12:50 PM
Title : Me Not Meant for Great Friends

I have come to a realization that I am not meant for anything more than close friends.

Gen is my closest of closest friends. I do not regret that. In fact, I really appreciate that.
but sometimes, i want more, a best guy friend.

someone i can shop with,
someone i can eat with,
someone i can watch movies with,
someone i can talk about random things with, ie hair styles, piercings.. i dunno.. any random stuff.
someone i can do nothing with, you know what i mean.
just the company of friends keep u in peace.

but i guess i wasnt meant for more.

i have made some potentially close friends. but they fade away in time.
i had to migrate or they had to migrate.. all these changes, i grew to handle them.
because i never had to face them ever again, they'd be in some other country.

it's harder when they are still in the same school, and awkwards sitches..(situations fyi)

i have given up trying to get a best guy friend.. its useless.. i wasnt meant for more.

tahmid's nice really nice, but i don't see us being more than good friends from school.

i used to go to movies almost every week, go to lunch after school, be invited to LAN.. nowadays i don't get invited to any of those anymore so often..

its sad, how much my lifestyle has changed since last year.

much less action in such a short period is hard to adjust to.

anyway, it it was not meant to be it was not meant to be..

okkayy.. i just briefly photoshoped this pic.. like.. to emphasis on ME!! haha.. it is MY blog.

Date : September 20, 2008
Time : 6:52 AM
Title : Studying

Date : September 19, 2008
Time : 10:14 AM
Title : To or not to be Scene.

This is what i found for the definition of scene kid.

• Scene has been called the "preppy emo".  (preppy?? riight.. lolxzz)
  
• They tend to be loud and generally have a good time. (yup! sounds just like me!)
  
• They have a lot of confidence, which makes some of them stuck up. (Guilty as charged)
  
• They take a lot of pictures (to post on their Myspaces!). (haha, i have hundreds of pics after only a month after I got my new Cybershot phone I took over 500 pictures!, 'cept i post it on facebook and sometimes friendster.)
  
• They like little kid things like dinos, hairbows, coloring books, and playing in playgrounds. (I love stuffed animals! and cute little stuff! no idea why.. I just love to do kiddie stuff!)
  
• They like to go to concerts, but refer to them as "shows". (I love going to showss. but I just go to school shows because no one wants to follow me to the other showss  i.e. The Best Damn Tour!)
  
• They wear skinny jeans, tight shirts, and eyeliner. (okay, i don't wear those, I am not skinnyy, duhh! I do wear slim cut jeans though)
• The girls usually have a choppy hair cut, and they tease their hair a lot.
  
• The guys usually have long bangs which must be tossed out of their face. (My hairs long, but I wish it were longer)
  
• The girls usually have bright make-up. They love EVERYTHING in day-glo colors. (I love colors, but I don't wear make-up)
  
• They like to add extra letters to words, like kid is kidd, rawr is rawwr, et cetera. (hahass, caught in the act! Wells, I just like to use the letter 'z' more often than s or I just add a 'z' or an 's' after a word for funn!)
  
• They use old slang like stellar and rad. (I have suddenly been starting to use Uber! lols. xD. and 'so totally')
  

Date : September 12, 2008
Time : 8:14 AM
Title : Tribute to SJI

this ad shows old boys from sji telling there careers..

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dtaXgXkF6o&hl=en&fs=1]

Date : September 10, 2008
Time : 12:08 PM
Title : My Household (Uber Personal, Sad)

Since everyone seems to be blogging about their family, so will I.

Well, my parents are separated, they have been since October 2002 in Australia. This is the reason why we never moved to Perth where we were to live as permanent residents. I stayed with my dad until November 2003, in South Korea. I took a plane back to Singapore as an Unaccompanied Minor, or UM as they called it.

My parents never filed for divorced. So technically they are still married. But I am so past the stage where I am still in denial and dream of them being together again. I am now at the final stage of grief. Reorganization.

Stages of Grief.

1. Denial
2. Volatile Reactions
3. Despair
4. Reorganization

When I first came to Singapore, I was SOOO despressed and SOOO in denial. imagine it yourself, put yourself in my shoes, your dad sends you on a plane alone to another country you are not so familiar with. No more friends and family(to an extend).

I never actually had volatile reactions. This is because I have always managed to control my anger and frustration. I was so in despair when I first stepped into Public School. I was enrolled in Gan Eng Seng Primary School. I was 2 years older than my peers, they all seem to be leading a happy life. Having whole families. I was filled with so much despair and jealousy.

Then, slowly i began to accept that nothing can change. I can only wish my parents were together again, and that is it, but what's the use? I might as well move on with life and focus on my own future, not my past.

Moving on to Saint Joseph's Institution really help me out as well. They had this programmed called Rainbows. It was for the students whose parents are Divorced, Separated or Deceased. And we all got together in different groups every week to discuss our feelings.

Lately, I have been seeing my dad and have been in contact more frequently, but that is only because he is in the region.

I still so dream of a happy family, but I am realistic. Sometimes a dream is meant to stay that way. Even if a dream IS a WISH your heart makes. No matter how strong that WISH is..

I have been living with this burdern for 5 years. So if you are worried over your parents quarreling over petty issues, I would be envious of you. I'd rather a family like that than my actual BROKEN one.

Hats off.
Rooke

Date : September 7, 2008
Time : 10:39 AM
Title : Hair Care Advice

I have read a lot on how to maintain good hair. Though i can't really recall everything. This is what I remember.

Date :
Time : 9:00 AM
Title : Homemade Wax.. lol...

Homemade Wax! - Click here for another funny movie.

Date :
Time : 6:01 AM
Title : Sad Year.

This year has been a sad year for me. So much drama. Everything just seemed to fall apart. Right from the beginning of the year. Lost friendships. Bad luck. Teacher troubles. etc... It is only now that I have decided to pick myself up again! I can't wait for my lady in a shiny gown to save me. hehe:P..

Date : September 6, 2008
Time : 3:37 AM
Title : My Friends Montage

Please comment! and rate!

Here's the permenant link.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SrUOW75XMrI

here's the video..






I have not been myself lately. It is because a lot has been running through my mind. I don't feeling comfortable sharing it here. But you can take a pretty good guess if you know me, its about friends. Well, of course i care for them. Friendship is really important to me. If i can't trust my friends, I don't know why I'd hanging with them. And many of you think I have trust issues. And yes, I admit I may have trust issues. My parents are separated they have been for 6 years, so naturally, I have a "disability" to trust anyone so easily. A lot say, I am always so cheerful, charismatic. But the sad truth is, I am acting through my tears. I don't any friends that i can trust, except maybe my bestiiie in the who0Olle Wiiidde Woo0Orlld!! Genevieve!!! And Leo seems to be a worthy friend, so far. I am not a shallow person. I really am deep.

And recently I have been trying to make friends. But I can't seem to do it right. So I tried making friends online. Not just randomly, friends of friends, so atleast i know they aren't some 30-year-old dude from North Canada, just sitting and waiting for Summer.

These are the people I have met so far.

Valentina
Hazel
Xue Ning
Katrina
Jordan Marie
Eng Khong

Date :
Time : 12:07 AM
Title : Screenshot Time

Its been so long since we last had this segment!

Date : September 5, 2008
Time : 1:27 PM
Title : Public Apology

This post was inspired by a certain new friend. Who called me mean! Sorry, I hate it when first impressions go wrong. First impressions mean a lot to me. And yes, i know it was just a joke when she said "so mean ah"... haha.. But I took it seriously. :P

Date : September 3, 2008
Time : 8:51 AM
Title : Daniel's stupidity

Date : September 2, 2008
Time : 3:25 PM
Title : Fun time out!

Date :
Time : 12:43 PM
Title : First Photo Blog Post